Not all men

 Not all men sexually harass women. Not all men assault women. Not all men rape. 

Not all men verbally harass women and deliberately bully and intimidate. Not all men treat women like objects or possessions to be consumed or looked at. Not all men are bad men. Not all men are the problem. 

But not all men listen, and not all men understand. Not all men call out other men for poor behaviour towards women. Not all men stand up and say “You’re being out of order.” Not all men say “Leave her alone.” Not all men fail to laugh at sexist jokes, and not all men say to other men, “you wouldn’t dare to speak to me like that so why are you saying it to her?” 

Not all men will cross the street and slow down rather than make us feel intimidated on a lonely dark road. Not all men get why we don’t want to give you a smile. Not all men understand that we don’t need your creepy DMs or your comments about our bodies. Not all men comprehend that the clothes we wear - or don’t wear - have absolutely nothing to do with them. 

Not all men perceive what the every day reality is of women and girls, and not all men want to do the work to even try. Not all men have a wife or a daughter and therefore how can they possibly empathise by any other means? Not all men get it. Not all men want to. Because they’re too busy telling us that it’s not all men.

By Jayne Manfredi

@TheWomanfredi